Who am I? Lost I am.

Lost. I often find myself feeling a little lost from time to time. Lost in the city, a regular occurrence in Brussels at the moment. Lost while on attack in Touch, due to my lack of the 'cool' maori traits such as pace, a sidestep or mean dummy. Lost in life, sigh, as planning visa by visa, year by year can only allow for so much direction.

Or as recently, lost in languages. And no I'm not directly referring to being lost in the French Language, although this is entirely true. I don't know what's up or down in French. Literally. I don't know those words yet.

But, I just received an email from a close friend. A friend who has excellent and often very proper English. A friend who considers 'good grammar' a necessity when dating a guy. A friend who is from New Zealand. A friend who has the same mother tounge as I. Yet, she sent me an email and I didn't understand it all because of the slang and language.

I know that New Zealanders have a terrible habit of shortening all words to abbreviations, for what reason I am unsure. Apart from making us sound closer to Australians, and therefore less intelligent, I am not sure why we continue to do this.

Because of FOMO? We might not get invited to something unless we drop a couple of letters, or words. Because we are now so busy that we don't have time for Breakie so therefore reduce the word to suit the situation? Isn't it all a little OTT?

But then, a new one is thrown at me. Yes, I understand in context what this new abbreviation is. But what word it comes from, how it applies in the situation, and how common it is - I have no idea.

Which then in turn makes me feel lost. And then I feel a little 'emo' about it.

I don't understand New Zealand slang or lingo like I should. There are new words that I don't know or understand. I therefore, in conclusion, am possibly losing my 'touch' with New Zealand English. And to be honest, each time I see a group of New Zealanders together, I have trouble understanding now. It worries me as to how much I have to concentrate to listen, to catch every word and to fully understand everything.

I don't understand New Zealandish anymore. And it is the only language I have hope of fully grasping at the moment.

Mon francais, oui, parfois c'est beaucoup mieux. But most of the time I get lost and I don't understand, so I guess at what is being said, and then I get strange looks with the responses I make. Firstly because I answered the wrong question, and then surely secondly, I answered the wrong question the wrong way anyhows. My grasp on basic french is weak and sloppy. Comme un bebe avec sa cuiller. Weak and sloppy.

So lost I am. Who am I? I can't keep up with the new words of New Zealandisms. Yet, I can't learn quick enough the in's and the out's of French. Or should I be saying 'les dans et les dehors' du le Francais?

Lost has no grasp on languages. Lost is settled in amongst some isolated emotions now. Lost is me.

Lost thinks Becky should start using correct English again.